“Because here’s something else that’s weird but true: in the day-to-day trenches of adult life, there is actually no such thing as atheism.
There is no such thing as not worshipping. Everybody worships. The only choice we get is what to worship.

And the compelling reason for maybe choosing some sort of god or spiritual-type thing to worship–be it JC or Allah, be it YHWH or the Wiccan Mother Goddess, or the Four Noble Truths, or some inviolable set of ethical principles–is that pretty much anything else you worship will eat you alive.

If you worship money and things, if they are where you tap real meaning in life, then you will never have enough, never feel you have enough. It’s the truth. Worship your body and beauty and sexual allure and you will always feel ugly. And when time and age start showing, you will die a million deaths before they finally grieve you.

On one level, we all know this stuff already. It’s been codified as myths, proverbs, clichés, epigrams, parables; the skeleton of every great story. The whole trick is keeping the truth up front in daily consciousness.

Worship power, you will end up feeling weak and afraid, and you will need ever more power over others to numb you to your own fear.

Worship your intellect, being seen as smart, you will end up feeling stupid, a fraud, always on the verge of being found out. But the insidious thing about these forms of worship is not that they’re evil or sinful, it’s that they’re unconscious. They are default settings.

They’re the kind of worship you just gradually slip into, day after day, getting more and more selective about what you see and how you measure value without ever being fully aware that that’s what you’re doing.

And the so-called real world will not discourage you from operating on your default settings, because the so-called real world of men and money and power hums merrily along in a pool of fear and anger and frustration and craving and worship of self. Our own present culture has harnessed these forces in ways that have yielded extraordinary wealth and comfort and personal freedom. The freedom all to be lords of our tiny skull-sized kingdoms, alone at the centre of all creation.”
David Foster Wallace, Excerpt from “This is Water.”

This is such a clear and beautifully stated way to say that we must give our focus to what matters most to us. Our time, our attention, our worship must go to the priority at the center, otherwise we risk getting lost in the worship of false gods that will lead us out into the Blur.

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Most people fall short of their goals and they don’t understand why.
People have a lot of goals and they’re often lofty. They’re too far away. It’s good to have lofty goals, but then we need a blueprint. Here’s the picture of the Taj Mahal.. It’s impossible to build all at once immediately, so what steps do we need to start with?
Breathing space helps you reverse engineer your lofty goals into simple, yet important daily activities that you need to do right now. These compound and eventually you’ve laid the foundation, built the walls, and you’re significantly closer to having the Taj Mahal you envisioned.

Have you watched a flock of sheep? Sheep are not intelligent animals. Given the chance they will aimlessly wander away, becoming lost or eaten by predators.

Sheepdogs have been used for thousands of years to keep the herd together, keep them safe, and keep them organized. It is a tireless job that never ends. The sheepdog is always vigilant and always working. If a sheepdog relaxes or loses focus, a sheep will wander off.

Coach Tom Desotell and The Point College were the first place that I heard about the “sheepdog mentality” and its importance in team building. The “sheepdog mentality” means that we are always working to keep the team in shape and moving in the direction it needs to be. This is an incredibly important concept in work, family, and any situation that requires collaboration.
The leaders of the team must have a sheepdog mentality, but that’s not enough. The leaders must teach and encourage everyone to participate in the sheepdog mentality. A culture and environment where everyone is a sheepdog, will ensure that accountability, hard work, and focus keep the team organized and moving in the right direction. It builds an environment that lifts everyone up.

One of the misconceptions about this type of thinking is that it’s micromanaging. But again, watch the sheepdog closely as it does not unnecessarily bother the herd. Everything it does with meaningful purpose. It does not waste energy, bark at them, excite them, or scare them without a reason. It maintains a proper watchful eye and communication with the sheep so that it can act when necessary.

There will be those in every team that resist the the “sheepdog” mentality. But as leader, find the few who will buy in and empower them. Creating this kind of mentality even in just a few team members, will start to transform the entirety of the team over time.

*This piece was written by Bradley Binversie in collaboration with Coach Thomas Desotell.

We recently spoke with Coach Tom Desotell regarding team building. One of the interesting lessons he highlighted was the importance of recognizing that the team is made of unique individuals with different talents, needs, and backgrounds.

“People don’t deserve to be treated alike. They’re all different and have different needs. The worst thing you can do is treat them all the same. Treat them like they earn and deserve.”

Coach is not advocating for mistreating or discrimination, but an individualized approach to empowerment for the good of the collective.
Good leaders know that the high performers and the leaders are so important to the culture of the organization, and the high performers need to know this as well. Their behavior, body language, and attitude needs to be spoken about regularly. Ask them questions, make sure they are heard and valued.

A good leader does not want to build a big group of followers. They help develop many leaders for the good of the collective.

*Written by Bradley Binversie from Exclusivia in coordination with Thomas Desotell.

Here are a few ideas that can significantly contribute to high levels of commitment and work performance if they are implemented with consciousness and humility:

1. Moderate levels of arousal (associated with optimal performance) are more likely to be maintained when individuals feel seen, heard, valued, and respected. Resistance is minimized under these conditions.

2. People only invest in what they themselves create. Involve the workforce at a genuine level as much as possible in major initiatives affecting the company, starting with the vision.

3. Commitment to a relationship or an organization is a function of the possibility of growth. Where there is no growth potential, there is no commitment. Invest in the personal mastery and development of all members of the enterprise, and, as a result, you are likely to be richly rewarded.

4. Where knowledge is the product, the highest levels of performance are achieved by developing and involving the frontal lobes of the brain (both leaders and workers) in the application of functions. This is most readily achieved in an environment where reflection is encouraged and people feel safe in consistently doing the harder thing.

Management consultant Peter Drucker has noted that the number one practical competency for leaders is empathy. Unfortunately, there is a zero correlation between IQ and empathy.

In his paper “The Road to Empathy,” Dr. Frank Lachmann (2008) offered a definition of empathy that may make sense here. Empathy may be thought of as a method of gathering information about the subjective life of another person. It plays a role in understanding what another person is experiencing. In simpler terms, it enables a person to connect with others by putting him- or herself in “another’s shoes.” An important point is that the capacity for valid empathic understanding requires that one take an objective view toward oneself that is generally obtained through reflection. For the recipient of this type of understanding, being seen empathetically releases creative energy that, under the right conditions, can support a steady stream of innovation that contributes to maintaining a competitive edge in the marketplace. Robert K. Cooper recognized that 40 to 50 percent of an organization’s profit margin fluctuations are predictable based on employee feelings and opinions. A quote from “The Road to Empathy” might offer encouragement to those who don’t think they have the capacity for empathetic understanding: “Empathy, like any skill, can be acquired and enhanced by training and learning” (p. 52).

Treating everyone in an organization as if their internal life were inconsequential can result in hidden performance costs to a company.

In his book The Fifth Discipline, Peter Senge identifies the core disciplines that must be mastered to create a learning organization. What distinguishes learning organizations from traditional authoritarian types is the mastery of these disciplines: personal mastery, mental models, building shared vision, team learning, and systems thinking.

Personal mastery is the discipline of developing our personal vision by focusing our energies and developing a clearer view of reality.

Mental models are the deeply ingrained beliefs and generalizations that influence how we interpret the world and how we take action. Mastery of these two disciplines can be greatly facilitated by individual coaching.

Building shared vision refers to the need for a vision to be shared, if not co-created, by all members of the organization.

Team learning is the capacity of members of a team to suspend assumptions and enter in a genuine “thinking together” (e.g., a dialogue). Mastery of these two disciplines can be aided with individual coaching but requires structured group participation as well.

Systems thinking, the fifth discipline, is the recognition that organizations are bound by an invisible fabric of interrelated actions.

In general, resistance is minimized in situations in which people feel seen, heard, safe, and respected. Resistance is likely to be maximized in environments in which people feel invisible, unimportant, and controlled and are not treated as a vital part of the enterprise.

For example, an employer who is well-intentioned, compensates his employees well, and rewards merit might be surprised to discover that these same people behave in ways that indicate little commitment to their work. On the other hand, the employer who legitimately offers less tangible rewards but includes employees at each stage of tasks to be accomplished and genuinely demonstrates interest, curiosity, and respect in response to their input minimizes resistance.

What happens inside the individual affects performance—and there is always something happening inside the individual. This relationship can be significantly influenced by external circumstances. Thus, it becomes apparent that business effectiveness can improve with the application of a psychologically sophisticated understanding of human performance. It is also likely that product quality can be enhanced by understanding how human beings function in the workplace.

One of the few relationships in the psychological literature that is reliable enough over a broad range of performance to be labeled a law. The Yerkes-Dodson Law relates a broad range of performance to the general concept of arousal or drive. To simplify, almost any type of performance can relate to arousal, as shown on the curve above.

This relationship is important to business leaders because it shows that performance is optimal at moderate levels of drive. For many, this concept might seem counterintuitive. If a person’s performance does not meet expectation, we generally assume that he or she is unmotivated and that, if we could simply light a fire under him or her, performance would improve.

As shown on the chart above, this is not necessarily true. The fact is that many underperformers are conscientious, often perfectionistic, and even anxious about doing a good job and are overly focused on how their performance is perceived. Rather than being unmotivated, their arousal lies somewhere between modest and high on the curve shown above.